Mother
- Pro
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- Location: New York
Mother
I am
Because of you.
I made you laugh as an infant.
I made you crazy as a teenager.
I made you cry during my 20's.
I made you lonely during my 30's.
I surprised you in my 40's.
I sat with you in my 50's.
Mother
I know you can hear me.
I am here with you
By your side.
I love you.
Breathe your last breath
While I hold your hand.
(Like I pointed out in the original post of this piece - I am not in my 40's or 50's)
Because of you.
I made you laugh as an infant.
I made you crazy as a teenager.
I made you cry during my 20's.
I made you lonely during my 30's.
I surprised you in my 40's.
I sat with you in my 50's.
Mother
I know you can hear me.
I am here with you
By your side.
I love you.
Breathe your last breath
While I hold your hand.
(Like I pointed out in the original post of this piece - I am not in my 40's or 50's)
- Jahaliel
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Re: Mother
Something very sweet about this, made me think about watching my dad sit with his mum who had alzheimers. Simple and beautiful Pro. xx
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Re: Mother
The repetition added a deliberateness to your words and message. The form of this, with the word "Mother" alone as a stanza of its own stresses the weight of your words. I liked this sweet piece.
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Re: Mother
I like that second stanza, very creative and at the same time recognizable. The ending was sad and somewhat of a mood whiplash, but it's overall a very touching poem.
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Re: Mother
I really enjoyed this my friend.....Whisk
Whether a Gift or a Curse, We Write!
Thank you for your comments!
- Jovel320
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Re: Mother
Great sentiment and something we can all identify with. I know some of us made our mother's go through more than others, but overall we all have our faults. I love the way you brought this around to siting and holding mother's hand. She probably did the same countless of times and in a way is a sort of repayment for that. A very insightful and tender piece. Thanks for sharing!!!
Jovel
Jovel
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Re: Mother
I sat with my mom when she nearly died with cancer. She fooled everyone by living another 20 years.
Yet I would do it all again just to see her face. valentine
Yet I would do it all again just to see her face. valentine
- Ladywildalice
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Re: Mother
A poet does not necessarily have to be or experience the words he/she writes. It is the talent of that writer that gives life, body, and senses to what is written, so it seems to be a very personal experience. In that way, we can all connect to it. You are an exceptional writer and I always enjoy your work. This was lovely, tender, touching and enviable.
'Where ecstasy leaves gravity and dances with wild eyes' by Ladywildalice
- Mr D
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Re: Mother
Great write. Minimalistic I could say. Very evocative.
Darkness is the canvas, light is the paint
I dont mind if you guys just read without commenting my stuff :)
I dont mind if you guys just read without commenting my stuff :)
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Re: Mother
Lovely write. I miss your unique style and I miss your wonderful poetry. Well done on a very worthy spotlight