Loud Snores And Gunshots.

An archive containing past featured spotlight works, what we consider, some of the best works on TPS. Feel free to leave comments.
Post Reply
MusicMyLife
Regular Member
Regular Member
Posts: 227
Joined: June 23rd, 2012, 2:27 pm
Location: Carluke, Scotland.

Loud Snores And Gunshots.

Post by MusicMyLife » June 18th, 2015, 4:10 pm

The night shift is a bore. I sit here, reading sensationalism from a tabloid paper; I prefer broadsheet newspapers, as they guide me through a more educational experience. But, it’s all I have to read as my inked fingers pick up the coffee cup.

Drinking the coffee infuses me with the caffeine I need to stay awake. The office is hot, the loud snores from the nights drunken order bang at my head like a gun. I’m here to make money, not to fall in love and not to show any empathy, especially towards the people in the cell block.

The clock strikes 1am. The cells are full up and the parties are still raging on. The clubs and bars bustling, crime is on red alert, and with all this commotion, the stars still shine in the smoked out sky. And me, alone, looking at the moth that is attracted by the artificial light.

As I guess the crossword, as I use my overly energetic brain, in walks a man in black. He wears a black overcoat on a summer’s night. His eyes glazed like he’s puffed a few joints.

‘Can I help you?’ I ask with wonder.

‘Is there a James Johnston Here?’

‘Yes, he’s in one of the cells, why?’

‘Let’s just say that he has crossed me’

‘Well you can take that up with him when he is released’

‘I think I would like to see him now?’

‘Sorry, there’s no way you can see him at the moment’

The restless man begins to walk away. He then turns to face me. Pulling out a gun, he shoots and catches me on the leg. I fall, screaming in pain.

‘Where is he?’

‘I don’t know what cell he’s in?’

‘Where are the keys?’

I throw the keys at him. I’m lost in pain, sweating and looking for closure. My mistake may ruin me?

He leaves me to bleed and walks through the corridor into the cell block. I can’t move, demented by the harshness of the wound. I become fixated on the phone, trying to crawl towards it, but it seems light-years away.

I keep going, listening to numerous gun shots that go off in the cell block, every shot barks at my racing heart, this could be my end?

I near the edge, the conclusion of my struggle. I grasp and try to dial, but the phone is kicked away from me like a ball. I look through the chamber of the loaded gun and close my eyes. A horrendous bang shakes the room. I open my eyes and see no bright light or stairs, all I see is a dead man beside me. His dead eyes staring into my fear, I reach over and close them, does he even deserve that respect?



ramfire
Elite Member
Elite Member
Posts: 1222
Joined: May 28th, 2014, 11:56 am

Re: Loud Snores And Gunshots.

Post by ramfire » June 19th, 2015, 11:22 am

This action is so common these days. This is a slice of life that tells me life is very dangerous wherever one lives.



JASON
Elite Member
Elite Member
Posts: 3145
Joined: June 19th, 2012, 7:43 am
Location: here and there

Re: Loud Snores And Gunshots.

Post by JASON » June 24th, 2015, 2:16 pm

The 2nd half of this story was definitely better,you captured the panic well
and the ending was great...



rupertpupkin
Moderator
Moderator
Posts: 3342
Joined: April 19th, 2012, 10:03 am

Re: Loud Snores And Gunshots.

Post by rupertpupkin » July 5th, 2015, 6:06 am

Hi. Really enjoyed your tale here. Gripping from the start and never let up. Good one.


ImageImage

Post Reply